How have I never thought about this before?

My birthday coming and going this year made me have an epiphany of sorts. Something I never thought about until a few days ago.

A child's birthday means just as much to the mother as it does the child. That was a huge day for us as well. The day our children are born are such magical moments, ones that we will never forget. The first time they laid our babies on our chests. The first time we looked into their eyes and instantly knew they owned a piece of our hearts. Each time our children celebrate their birthday, it will always bring back the memories on the day they were born. I think my children's birthdays will always mean more to me than it does to them.

Does any of that even make sense? It made more sense in my head but is pretty hard to get down in writing.

It is truly amazing how God can put so much love in our hearts.

Sorry, I'm just babbling.

Things I wanted to type last night but was too tired

There was a lot I wanted to write yesterday but I didn't get a chance to blog until 11:30 pm. So yeah, I wanted to sleep more than I wanted to blog but I at least wanted to get my birthday down.

Elijah:
He started smiling on Sunday! I thought he had been doing it throughout the week, but I just wasn't sure. On Sunday though it was obvious. I can't believe he will be 2 months next week. He is quite the chunker! His reflux issues seem to have gotten much better and doesn't spit up nearly as often. He has also been cooing, which I absolutely love!

Faith:
Her imagination has just taken off. She makes up these worlds of her own and she loves to sing, making up her own words with a familiar tune. It is absolutely hilarious the things she comes up with. She has been much more helpful that I would have thought. While we still have tiffs between Faith and Samantha, depending on the day (they have bad days just like us adults) she will also sit and teach Samantha different things and really engage her in play. She holds a pen like an adult, which is the only thing her PAT instructor could tell us to work with her on. That was last month, and she now does it all the time. She loves to draw and paint and is finally starting to draw real pictures.

Samantha:
She is starting to potty train! She went to the potty a few times before, but yesterday was a really good day. She had her diaper off all morning until her nap and never peed on the floor. Last night before bed she said she had to use the potty and so I went ahead and took off her diaper. Sure enough, she went. Hopefully she will be out of diapers soon! She isn't afraid of strangers at all, like Faith still is and will talk to anyone. It still amazes me on how different Faith and Samantha are. We are working with her on how to pedal her tricycle. She gets frustrated though and will just push herself along.

Me:
I'm still having some problems breastfeeding. I have absolutely no idea what is going on anymore. The LC thought I had another yeast infection in my breast. I had to put Eli back on oral Nystatin, I took a one time pill, used Monistat on my nipples, as directed, but nothing was working. She also told me to try using Gentian Violet because that helps in almost all cases. I wanted to use that as a last resort though because it turns his mouth purple. Since nothing else was working and I was still in pain, I started using it Sunday night. I read that you are suppose to use it for 3 days. If it hasn't helped by then, it isn't a yeast infection and to call the OB. Well, it has helped with some of my symptoms but not all. I am still having a very painful latch on (this started just a few weeks ago) and I'm still having burning. It just, I don't know, hurts. It's hard to explain. So maybe I had thrush also, but I still have something else going on. It is all happening only on my right side. It is so beyond frustrating.

It is still hard to wrap my head around the fact that I am a mother of three. After my last miscarriage I didn't think I would be able to have anymore. While I would love a large family, I was also ok if I only had Faith and Samantha. Especially thinking back just a few short years ago when I didn't think I would be able to have any children. After the last miscarriage my doctor told me there were tests we could run to see why it keeps happening, but that they were expensive. I told him if I hadn't been able to have children yet I most definitely would have, but that I had 2 beautiful daughters and that I was at peace if pregnancy didn't happen again. I politely declined. But then my beautiful Elijah came along!

There are so many nights when I peep into his crib before I head to bed myself and I just want to scoop him up and bring him to bed with me so I can cuddle with him. I don't, of course, but the urge is overwhelming. I guess it shouldn't surprise me though because I still have these feelings with the girls. I either want to crawl into bed with them or when they come into our room at night I just want to put them in our bed. I've let them crawl into our bed before and the outcome isn't good (multiple wakings at night when them coming into our room and wanting to sleep with us) though so I now always bring them back to their bed. When we did let them in bed with us, neither Chris nor I got any sleep.

Anywho, there is still more floating around in my head but there are things that need to be done. I really should have been working instead of typing. Oops!

Another decade bites the dust

Today was the big 3-0 birthday! I can't believe I am actually in my 30's. When I think about the journey I went through in my 20's, I can't help but wonder what the next 10 years will bring.

When I started out my 20's, Chris and I had been dating a few months, I wasn't yet a Christian, didn't even think about marriage let alone when I would have children. It's not that I didn't want to eventually get married to someone, I just never thought I would find someone who I would trust enough to marry. I had my life laid out already. I was going to get my BS in Biology, move to North Carolina and go to UNC-Wilmington to get my masters in Marine Biology. I would then either get into the research field and be out on the boats or I wanted to work training dolphins. Never did I imagine I would become a Christian, fall in love, get married, have 3 children, work from home so I could be with them, and be on my way to being a preachers wife, all by the time I turned 30.

God is good indeed. Only He knew what turns my life would take.

We had a beautiful evening at home. Chris came out with a Hostess cupcake with a candle in it for my "cake". Both girls drew me pictures as their presents...and really, those were the best presents in the world. We did our traditional Happy Birthday dance to the Beatles with everyone (including Eli!) dancing around the living room. It was a perfect evening. It's hard to grasp that this is my life now (hard to grasp in a good way!). I mean, I am a mother of THREE children and I have a wonderful loving husband.

Oh yeah, and I am now 30. Crazy. I feel like I should be so grown up now, it's kind of bizarre. I can no longer joke with Chris that as he is on the downhill slope of his 30's I am still in my 20's (which I did down to the last day!).

Ah sweet 30's, I hope you're good to me!

Good advice

"Bloom Where You Are Transplanted" by Myrna McKinley.

It stated, "Always be ready to offer friendship; do not wait until it is offered. For whatever reasons, not all people know how to reach out. Not all people realize they need to make you feel welcome because you are new. If that should be the case, don't pout. Just reach out yourself. Create opportunities to be with fellow Christians. Friendships will happen."

Advice I need to remember since I'm terrible at opening up with people. Well in real life at least.

1 Peter 13-16

Who is there to harm you if you prove zealous for what is good?

But even if you should suffer for the sake of righteousness, you are blessed. AND DO NOT FEAR THEIR INTIMIDATION, AND DO NOT BE TROUBLED,

but sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts, always being ready to make a defense to everyone who asks you to give an account for the hope that is in you, yet with gentleness and reverence;

and keep a good conscience so that in the thing in which you are slandered, those who revile your good behavior in Christ will be put to shame.

Gone baby gone

I have been wanting to blog all week, but it just hasn't worked out that way. Today is the first day we have been home all day and it is also the first time I have all 3 children to sleep, at the same time, all in their own beds.

So as I sit here enjoying the amazingly beautiful day, in the quite of my house with the fresh breeze coming in, I sit amazed at how blessed I am. I know I don't deserve any of it, yet God has still given me such blessings in my life. I am so incredibly in love with my children and feel their unspoiled, pure love towards everything in their life. They make me laugh, they make me cry, and yes, they make me want to pull my hair out at times (you know, like when they go to bed 2 hours late yet still wake up at the same time causing meltdowns at the drop of the hat...ah yes, it was a long morning). I never want to imagine what it would be like to NOT have them in my life, not even for a second, because my life would be so empty without their faces. They make me a better person because I want to be a better role model for them and I want them to be raised knowing God and his everlasting love for us.

I am so very fortunate to be home with them all day. I can't imagine having to send them to day care. I love being here every time they learn something new, or just sitting and watching them laugh and play. I know it's not an option for all people, but am so very blessed it is for me.

We were at a visiting church this past weekend and a couple took us out to eat afterwards. We were sitting there talking and the woman said they were marrying off their baby this spring. As the conversation went on, it turns out their baby was only 17 years old which I thought was just nuts. But the mother just kept saying how happy she was that they were going to have the house to themselves now. It almost sounded like she was pushing for the marriage just so she would be out of the house. When she asked what we were planning for school for our children and we told her we were homeschooling, she said oh no, not me...I couldn't get my children off to kindergarten fast enough. I just didn't even know what to say. I love having my children with me and I love being such a big part in their lives. I look forward to being the one to teach them and watch as they enjoy learning about different things. It would break my heart to have to send them away. And I definitely do not look forward to the day when our house is quiet because our children have grown and moved away. It saddens me to try to think that far ahead. Yet here I was sitting across from a woman who could never wait for her children to be gone.

After more conversating I found out that she was also married when she was 17 and had her first child shortly after. I wonder if that had anything to do with it. Maybe it is because she didn't know how it felt to face the possibility of never having a child, maybe she just didn't appreciate what she had in her children, I'm not really sure, but the difference between us couldn't have been any clearer.

I view our children as a precious gift from God and take that gift very seriously. They (along with Chris) are the loves of my life. They are the most beautiful things in the world.

And with just to end with a little story: Last Wednesday during Bible class Samantha wouldn't say her OT books and so she wasn't able to get a toy out of the treasure chest. She can say them, we do it every day, but I guess she just didn't want to talk. So yesterday I asked Samantha if she was going to say them today so she could get her toy as well. Faith was being really encouraging to her and letting her know that she could do it. Then, after class last night, the first thing Faith said when she saw me was, "mama, Samantha said the books today so she got a toy!" She was simply beaming. Faith was so proud of Samantha for saying them. It was so beautiful. It's times like these that I try to soak up every memory.

Nope, I will never wish for my children to be gone.

Something no breastfeeding mom wants to hear

The word mastitis. As in, you have mastitis. As in, I have mastitis.

Talk about horrible! On Wednesday night at church I fed Elijah and noticed my breast still felt like it had a spot that was full. I just chalked it up to he just didn't eat as much. At about 10 pm I started feeling kind of yucky, then at 11 pm the body aches stared. I took my temp right after this and before I went to bed and I had no fever yet. I didn't sleep well at all. I couldn't get warm, my body was so incredibly achy, and my breast was killing me. I got up with Elijah at about 3:30 am and could barely carry him back to my bed to feed him. I was suppose to be heading to my sisters yesterday but when I woke up, I told Chris we weren't going and that I felt horrible. I called the doctor right at 8:00 am but it took until 3:00 to get a call back. I figured it was mastitis but didn't know if I should take anything, so I didn't. As the day went on my temp got higher and maxed out at 103.9. Chris said it was the worst he has ever seen me. Guess my looks matched how I felt! Luckily his professors let him take the day off to help me with everything. Not sure what I would have done otherwise because I could barely get out of bed.

So, today I feel better but not great. Still tired and weak. I forgot to take some Tylenol for quite a few hours and my temp started creeping back up again. I'm on antibiotics too. I sure hope this gets better pretty quickly and that I have no reoccurances! I definitely don't want to go through this again. I felt like I was hit by a truck yesterday.

I also had a yeast issue going on in the same breast last week. I was put on meds for that as was Elijah, even though he showed no signs of thrush. I have no idea if it was related or not.

Just because I thought life wasn't busy enough

Well, starting Monday it looks like I will be officially back to work. For those who don't know, I work from home as a virtual assistant. Pretty much an administrative assistant from home. I have 3 clients that I work for, 1 of which I have continued to work for the entire time. He is very flexible, the hours are small, and I can do it any time of the day. One of my other clients I will be discontinuing with because, well, she is not the nicest of people and quite honestly I don't need that negativity in my life right now. My other client is truly wonderful but I am a bit worried on how I am going to juggle all of his work. There is some phone work and just a lot of things that need to be done and need to be kept up with. I was honest in telling them this too so we will see how it goes. I am so incredibly fortunate to be able to work from home but it is such a huge challenge when there are young children. Most people don't realize how difficult it is.

Chris and I have talked about it though and if it gets to be too much, which I'm taking a pretty good guess here that it will, that I am going to drop the other client that I have a ton of work for and just keep the flexible one I have been with. He can take up the slack on the money we would be losing since he now goes out and preaches each week, but I'm going to be needing health insurance again, which is a huge cost that we hadn't planned on. So...not sure where that is going to come from if I drop this other big client.

Sorry guys, this was probably of no interest to anyone! It's just nice sometimes to get things written down.

Teach him gently

Teach him gently,
Little Teacher,
He has known no one but you;
And your honest loving teaching will inspire him to be true.

Teach him tenderly...
His teacher
Will impress upon his mind
All the attributes of goodness,
And, in turn, he will be kind.

Teach him quietly...
A teacher
With soft words can turn away
Childish anger, and your pupil
Will be self-controlled someday.

Teach him carefully...
No teacher
Can afford mistakes
When the souls of generations
Hang on errors that she makes.

Teach him gently,
Little Teacher,
Teach him laughter, teach him tears;
For each moment spent in teaching
You will live a thousand years!

~Author unknown

One more thing!

Ok, 3 posts in one day I can promise you won't happen often, but there is one thing that is so very important to report on...


CONGRATULATIONS LISA!!!!!!!! Baby Cloe is absolutely beautiful. Take it easy, enjoy your amazing daughter, and let me know if you need anything!

And yes, you do have something coming from me, I was procrastinating as I thought I had some more time...ahem....oops. And I think I have been holding your thank you card in my room for the last month. I had it written out before Elijah was born. Yet in my room it still sits along with others.

What is wrong with this statement?

Does anyone else see anything wrong with this quote from an e-mail I received from my mom, regarding my brother and the way he is living:

"but I feel that it's his soul going to hell, not mine."

Yet I'm the bad one FOR caring that his soul is going to hell. And for caring about the souls of my children. I don't know about you but I don't want ANYONE going to hell, let alone my family members.

Family drama is always fun

I was just told that my mom was ashamed of me and "my religion". I am merely a Christian. I use the Bible as my guide, not man made doctrine. I am a sinner who is trying to live in the world but not be a part of it, I am a follower of God and try to apply to my life everything he asks of me.

And that is a reason for a parent to be ashamed of me?

Maybe I should do drugs or start drinking...maybe that would be an easier pill to swallow than my Christianity. I can see first hand how Christians are so hated in this world. How easy it is to twist our faith around and make us look like the bad guys.

I can say though, "I will not be, I will not be moved".

We must all remain steadfast in the word of God when others blast us for it and even when the decisions we must make are hard.

“And do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. But rather fear Him who is able to destroy both soul and body in hell.” Matthew 10:28.

5 weeks old

5 weeks already! He just seems so different today. He is getting so chubby now, as I just realized today. Today was the longest he has been awake and it didn't seem like I would ever get him to sleep. For some odd reason he keeps waking up at about 4 am and is so gassy he can't go back to sleep. He will keep waking up every 10 minutes or less until after I get up with the girls at 7:00. He will finally then fall asleep for a little while longer. I have no clue what that is about but it seems to be pretty consistent. Today he started cooing a little bit and I don't know if he actually did smile at me or what but he did it several times in a row as he was looking at me. Guess time will tell!

My post-baby OB appointment is Monday, I believe. I'm looking forward to seeing them all again. It will be quite interesting to see how everyone behaves. The girls have always been good and the doc just loves them...but now there are 3.

Peace

(Pulled over from old blog)

I have had a few lessons in the last few days. I have been asking God for patience but I don't think I have been listening when the practical application came into play. But a few days ago I have made a resolution. It's not a New Year's type of resolution...you know, the one that you make and then a few weeks or perhaps even a few months later you are back to your old tricks. No, this is a life resolution. A few days ago I finally realized the woman I need to be to strengthen my children in the Lord, the woman I need to be to be an encouragement to my husband, and the woman I need to be to be pleasing to God. I think I have been failing at all aspects. What prompted this...I was starting to see myself in my daughter. Kind of hard to keep denying it when you come face to face with it...and I don't like what I see.

I am learning to be more calm not only when dealing with my children but also with the world. I have to first and foremost be an example to my children. How can I teach them to be patient when I am not showing it myself? How can I teach them to let God have control of your life when I have been fighting it? It has been exhausting fighting it and trying to always be in control.

So I started the week with this new found epiphany of sorts. How has my week been so far? Amazing. I am working on giving my life completely over to God, which is something I should have figured out a long time ago. I am admittedly stubborn. I have been praying more, doing more of my personal reading, and truly giving grace to have Him lead me in my life. I have been a calmer person. I have been treating my children differently, which has also resulted in a shift of behavior. Do they still throw fits? Of course, but I have been dealing with them calmly. I don't doubt this has been a change in the positive for them as their behaviors have become more positive. It has also surprisingly given me more energy as well. All my burdens are not mine alone to bear and that is a huge weight lifted off of me.

Quite interestingly, we had a Bible study last night where the man teaching also spoke of this. As was stated, "you can be conquered or you can conquer". At least something like that. And you know what, I have been conquered by life's situations long enough.

I have been thanking God ever since for finally allowing the scales from my eyes to be loosened. Does my attitude give grace to God? Something I have been asking myself throughout each day.

1 month!

(Pulled over from the old blog)

I absolutely cannot believe it has been one month already. I don't understand how it is possible. Things are going well on the adjusting period. The last few nights I have just been waking up with Elijah about every 3 hours. BUT both Faith and Samantha have slept through the night. Much better than just a few days ago when they both were waking up multiple times, along with Elijah. Up until a few days ago Elijah would be wide awake at 8:00 pm. He was ready to go when I was ready to go to bed. I couldn't get him to be before 11, and usually it was past 11:30. And even though the girls were waking up many times through the night they were still up bright and early. It amazes me how quickly you forget about this phase. I guess it's no different than forgetting just how bad morning sickness is, or how uncomfortable the last weeks are, or just how bad labor is. Each bad part is so quickly forgotten, at least for me. Elijah has been having an issue with spitting up too. At first it was really bothering him and I thought maybe it was reflux, but now he just spits up and doesn't blink an eye. Sometimes it is just a little, sometimes he completely covers me. He is gaining weight just fine though.

It has been so different having a boy. I have been peed on and pooped on so many times! The girls never did that to me! The worst part of course was the circumcision. They didn't do it in the hospital like I thought they would, but in the docs office a few weeks later. The actual procedure was fine, it was after the local wore off that broke my heart. At his 2 week he weighed 8 lbs 3 oz. Not sure what he is up to now since he isn't seen again until 2 months.

I must say that it has been so strange not being at the docs office. I was there every week since I was 20 weeks. You really get to know the staff and doc when you see them all the time. I miss them! I wasn't very happy with the ped I was stuck with and no other doctor would take us. I called my OB nurse to see if she could help me out in getting a new one...and she was actually able to. And the ped wanted the whole family! I took Samantha in for her 2 year last week (yet another post...she turned 2 on March 26th!) and I absolutely loved her. When she walked in the room she said, so...(nurse lady) must really like you! So yeah, I miss those guys and not sure what I will do after my 6 week on April 14th.

I would say the hardest part in the adjustment period has been the pressure I get everywhere else. I help Chris with they typing up of his notes for school, which is quite a feat, I have homework myself for the preachers wife courses...which I had a take home test due 2 weeks after Elijah was born (yeah, I'm sure I did really well on that!), I am still working myself, I'm trying to take care of everything around the house and with the kids so that Chris can just focus on his studies. He doesn't need to extra stress of things going on around here, he has plenty from school. When they said it was intense, they were not lying. From the time Elijah was born until last Wednesday when finals were over we probably say him for about 30 minutes a day. I wanted all that time to go to the girls. He had just gotten behind from me having the baby and had a ton of work to do. I'm sure this quarter will be much better.

Anyway, Elijah has been a really good baby. He does have his fussy times, but overall is generally happy. He actually sleeps through his sisters noise during the day. The girls have been all over the poor little guy. I was expecting after the first week they would be over him...but they just can't get enough. Samantha walks around calling him Little Buddy, since Chris called him that one day. It's so precious to see how they are with him. They are always trying to put his pacifier back in if he spits it out, they are always covering him up, giving him kisses. While we have had our rough times, I would say it has definitely been easier having the 3rd than adding the 2nd. Faith and Samantha usually keep each other company. I am always extra careful to give Samantha more attention though. Faith is always in your face and is demanding your attention, and the baby of course does too. Samantha has always been the type though just to hang out in the bedroom and keep herself company. She is too laid back and I want to make sure she is getting equal attention.

We had signed Faith up for a soccer league that started this past weekend. We really thought she would like it. Um yeah, not so much. They had a practice on Friday and then a game on Saturday. She just kind of galloped around the field on Saturday and wouldn't go after the ball. She just kind of followed everyone else around the field, always a few steps back. The ball even came to her once and she just stood there and watched it go by. She really didn't like it much at all and told us that. Of course she liked the snacks at the end of the game though. We are seeing if we can get our money back and maybe we will try when she is older. She has however been wanting to learn to play hockey. We have had her in a learn to skate program since January and I'm telling you she is a natural on the ice. She is even doing great in the hockey skates, which I hear is harder than figure. She always wants to go to the other rink where they practice hockey. I love it...of course! The hockey coach even knows her now (obviously they don't get many 3 year old girls who are wanting to play hockey!) The coach can't wait to get her in, just waiting for her to get a little better. I think she needs to be a bit older too. She has been a little hesitant on the opposite sex. She does fine if her teachers are women, but if it is a man she really pulls back. He even gave Faith a helmet and gloves to take home, which was so awesome. And to think I was just trying to find something for her to do this winter. I was just going to have her learn to skate. When I was trying to explain to her what ice skating was I explained that when we watch hockey, that is what they do. Then her face lit up and she said, "I get to learn how to play hockey!!!" Okaaay, sure, why not!

And here she is:





(Even Samantha had to get in the fun)

Elijah's birth story

(Pulled over from my old blog)

Whew, what a month it has been. I seriously cannot believe we are already hitting 4 weeks since Elijah was born. AND I haven't even posted about it yet. My sincerest apologies. So without further delay, here is finally the birth story:

Elijah Matthew finally made his debut at 1:55 am on March 6th. He weighed in at 7 lbs 13 oz and was 21 3/4 inches long.

I was scheduled to be induced at 9:00 am on March 5th. Well, other women kept coming in in active labor and so we kept getting pushed back. We finally got the ball rolling at 2:30 pm. I was already starving and was really tired since I had been up since 3 am. The contractions took about an hour to start up. I figured it would take about 4 or 5 hours...boy was I WRONG! I put off getting my water broke for a little while because I wanted to be sure the contractions were pretty steady. At about 10:00 pm I finally agreed to have it done and the contractions really picked up. Bad part was though that I was already exhausted from not sleeping. I kept laboring through and at about 12:30 the contractions were really strong and I asked to be checked. I was a 6 at this time but they knew it wouldn't be much longer. My cervix was still a bit posterior and so she pulled that forward (um big OUCH when in active labor!!!) and wanted me to lay on my side to try to help it along. Well, I don't tolerate labor well at all when I'm laying down in bed. The contractions were one on top of each other and the pitocin was causing them not to build up in pain level but started of really strong. I finally told DH I couldn't do it anymore. He tried to encourage me along, and was absolutely wonderful, but after a few more contractions I said I had enough. It was about 12:30 am at the point and I was beat. I hadn't eaten since 7 am and was out of energy.

So, he calls the nurse to get the epidural started. They actually got in there really really quick. Apparently they were already up on the labor floor. I talked to them about my really bad experience and how sick I had gotten. Apparently my blood pressure is low and it can drop even more with an epidural. Me getting sick last time was from that, and I never knew it. The nurse really kept up with my blood pressure and I didn't get sick at all. It took a little while to take but slowly but surely they eased off. After awhile I could only feel them in 1 spot. At a little after 1 they finally went away in that spot but I was having pain in the nether regions (completely doable after the contractions I was having!). The nurse told me it was the baby coming down. She rushed out and rang the doctor and told him to hurry! She didn't even want to check me because she knew if she put my legs up the baby would be out. The doctor arrived about 10 minutes later, suited up, and we were off! After only about 3 sets of pushes he was here! I had no tears whatsoever, which is a first. I am sooooo pleased with that to say the least.

Right after I got the epidural I turned to my husband and said you know, I'm not even disappointed in having to get an epidural this time. I wasn't expecting to, but I really tried my best. It was obvious it was the pitocin making my contractions so bad because they turned it down when I was getting my epidural and they really spread out and weren't as hard. No, it wasn't what I wanted, but neither was the induction. Plus, the epidural experience was a thousand times better than with Faith.

So after all of that, we are now the parents of 3 children. How surreal! (oh, and he looks just like Faith did. Unfortunately got the bigger nose too). Here are some pictures!

(Not the best pic of me but what do you expect at 2 am and almost up for 24 hours)




(Just arrived home)
(Getting ready to leave the hospital)

A new blog home

Ah, home sweet home. It was time for a change. I'm a different person than I was when I started my first blog. I wanted a fresh new start. If you wanted to take a look at the past, please feel free to do so HERE.

Just beware, I was in a pretty dark phase in my life when I started it. It was a huge outlet for me.

Now, I have an amazing family and I want to keep a journal on the raising of our children. We are so very blessed with all God has given us, yet we deserve none of it.

Faith is 3 1/2, Samantha just turned 2, and Elijah is 1 month. We have a crazy life, one that I wouldn't trade for the world. I would take my worst day with 3 children over my best day with no children any day. We struggled to start our family, have had many miscarriages, but now have our beautiful children. Life doesn't get any better.

Chris is going to school right now to become a preacher. He has a little over a year left. We have had amazing support from churches all of the US who have made this possible. It has been a tough struggle, but it is only temporary. I try to do everything I can around the house and with the children so he can focus first and foremost on his studies. His studies often takes his time away from us, but we know it is only temporary and the outcome will be worth it.